Are you the kind of woman who has to have all her stockings in a row? I can get pretty neurotic when it comes to certain things being ‘just so’ and it has really caused myself and my family some stress over the years. I was usually at my worst during the holidays. In my efforts to create the perfect moments for my family, I wound up creating chaos and stress instead. I’ve since mended my ways and am happy to report that we are actually creating good memories now that our children and ourselves will look back fondly on in the future. 

It bothers me when I see others stressed during the holidays, because I know all too well what it was like to be in such a state. I understand that this is the time of year when we begin to pay more attention to our dollars, we want the best deals because we want to buy the most and best presents to show our loved ones how much they mean to us. We want to get together with others because visiting is so important during this time of year and stress begins to creep in because, on top of our already busy lives, we now want to be better friends, better family, better volunteers, better_______. (You fill in the blank)

I get it… the holidays make us crazy like that, and if we are not careful, the holidays will come and go without the joy, peace and contentment we are supposed to experience this time of year. With my natural personality, I am prone to falling into stress over just about any big event… holidays, birthdays, you name it, I can get stressed over any of it if I am not careful; but I have learned over the years that none of this does me or my family any good, it certainly is not fruitful and I make myself and others around me miserable in the process, filling our precious years with unpleasant memories rather than good ones. No one wants that! So years ago, I decided to cut myself some slack, even if it meant that I wasn’t going to create the “perfect” meal, “perfect” decoration, “perfect” moment. I would RELAX and learn to enjoy myself and my time with the family. It wasn’t easy at first to not obsess over every detail, but I have gotten the hang of it and now, when things begin to feel stressful, I stop, breathe and ask myself, ” What is really important to me for this moment, event/day?”

Here are a few practical things that helped me to stop stress and learn to enjoy the seasons in my life:

1. The Bible. Yes, scripture has a lot to say concerning worry, anxiety, joy and peace. As believers, we must realize that the bible is our absolute instruction manual for all of life. In all things, God’s Word has valuable input. If you are struggling with stress like I was, look to the Word and learn to meditate on His Word. Learn to pray His Word. Learn to speak His Word over your life. Doing just this one thing will transform you more than any self-help program out there!
2. Praise and Thanksgiving.   Oh my, this one has done wonders for me! Get a hold of some good praise music, and then play it during the day where you can actually here it. My husband installed an under-the-counter CD player with an iPod port and radio for me last year because I spend so much time in our kitchen so that I could actually hear the music while I worked. It is amazing how much my mood is lifted while listening to music that is glorifying God and inspiring me! Often as I am listening to the lyrics, thanksgiving rises up within in me and I find myself thanking God several times for His blessings and for Who He is to me, just from one song! It is hard to be stressed and worried and negative when praise and thanksgiving are pouring out of your heart and mouth!
   
3. Take care of yourself the right way. As wives and mothers, we tend to neglect ourselves while taking care of everyone else around us. Recently, I realized I was so busy taking care of everyone else one day that all I had put into my body was 1/2 a pot of coffee, ramen noodles for lunch, and a cup of tea in the afternoon! I also had been running on 4 hours sleep, no exercise and no water- it happens to the best of us, but when it happens regularly, it is downright dangerous to our health. Your body has needs and it is your responsibility to care for it well. When you are well rested, strong and nutrient -rich, you WILL perform better on a daily basis, you will be able to cope with daily stress in a much better manner and your family will thank you for it. Take care of yourself! 
   
4. Keep your surroundings orderly and clean. You’d be surprised at how much this affects a stay-at-home mother’s mood! –As well as the overall mood of her family! Years ago, I was introduced to a wonderful woman known as The Flylady on the internet. I personally think she is brilliant for committing to help others gain control over their homes and their lives in such a non-threatening and non-judgmental way. When I was growing up, my own mother was super organized and cleaned house regularly, I even had chores to do every day and participated in Saturday clean up around the house. To this day, I can walk into my mother’s home and clean it top to bottom to her standards no problem; but when I had my own home to clean and children underfoot, I could not seem to get it together in this area. Enter Flylady and the light bulb went on inside my head. I still struggle from time to time with clutter, but following her principles really helped me and still do to this day. I also love that she helps you prepare for the holidays with her Holiday Cruising Missions. It is no fun to go through the holidays afraid that people might stop by and see your messy house. It steals your joy and peace during the season when you should most be enjoying yourself. The great thing about following her instructions is that she always makes sure to let you know that you are never behind, you can just jump right in and any progress is good progress!
5. Do yourself up a little each day. This one may seem a little silly if all you do is stay at home each day with the kiddos, but studies have shown that your appearance is closely linked to your mood. Now, I am not saying that you have to look like a model in a magazine, but taking a shower, putting your hair in a cute ‘do’ for the day and maybe a little lip gloss and clean clothes can make you feel like a million bucks. I have gone through stages of ‘frumpiness’ and I can tell you that I was much less productive and my mood was not as pleasant than when I did myself up a little, sprayed a bit of perfume on and greeted the day with a fresh outfit on.
   
6. Do a little research online to see if there are some steps you can take to minimize your workload during the holidays. Maybe you can hire a friend’s teenager to wrap presents for you. Are there certain dishes for your holiday meal that can be prepared ahead of time and frozen until they are needed? Are there any tasks that can be delegated to others to free up your time? Ask yourself what is really important to you and your family for this holiday? Then cut out those tasks that don’t fit in with what is truly important.
   

Remember, stress is a robber of peace, joy and contentment. Don’t give it place in your life this holiday season, enjoy your time with your family and always remember “Who” the season is really about: our Lord, Jesus Christ! Don’t stress: Be Blessed instead!