Have you ever had “one of those days”? Today was exactly that for me, it seemed as if everything that could go wrong, did. Usually I can handle or at least cope with those ‘bumps in the road” but not today. Today, with every bump in the road, a ripple went right through my spirit causing discouragement, frustration and despair. If my children disobeyed, the ripple screamed ” You’re a failure as a mother!” If I felt misunderstood by a friend, the ripple screamed “See, no one really likes you!” When I burnt the 3 loaves of bread in the oven – “You can’t even run your household correctly!”  Earthquake after earthquake, but it was the ripples, or the aftershocks, that I felt the most today. What do you do with the after shocks of the earthquakes of life?

Once, a few years ago, I had a vision while crying out to the Lord of the foundation of a house being slammed by an impact repeatedly. Many times this foundation withstood the impact each time it came. Finally, upon the very last impact, the foundation could withstand it no more, and a delicate hairline fracture occurred within the foundation. One could only see it if you were right next to the foundation, but nonetheless, it was indeed there. When I came out of the vision, the Lord spoke to me and said, ” There is a crack in your foundation” Now, some would jump to the conclusion that obviously this was a judgment about me in the negative sense, but I sensed such love and compassion from the One Who spoke it to me. He showed me that as human beings our foundations can only withstand so much of the impact from this fallen world, that no matter how strong we try to be, it is only a matter of time before we are affected by its impact, its earthquakes, its ripples. I was so discouraged and cried out once more and said” Ah but Lord, I am not a builder, I would not know how to repair such damage” to which the Lord replied, “Exactly.”

When you feel feel damaged by the impact of life, turn to Jesus, the Master Builder!

Act 20:32  And now I commend you to God, and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you the inheritance among all them that are sanctified.

When I think about how incapable I am, I am reminded of just how capable He is! He not only knows how to build up, but also how to repair any damage done. This is why we need Him, our Savior, our Lord! There is a gospel of self-sufficiency polluting the church today that heaps all of salvation and the maintenance of it upon our own shoulders. Jesus wants us to know that He is the One able to sympathize with our weaknesses! I am so grateful that I can turn to Him to fix me, because truly, I am not able to do it myself! The only requirements of us are that we: 1) come to Him 2) Learn of Him by studying His Word & 3) Obey His Word

Mat 11:28  Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Mat 11:29  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
Mat 11:30  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Any other efforts than that are simply futile, we cannot save ourselves and we cannot maintain ourselves in our own human strength! We were not meant to bear our own burdens, that is why He did it for us at the cross, and then God went even further by raising Him from the dead and sending the promised Holy Spirit to be our helper and that includes when we are having “One of those days…” Jesus is faithful to help us, to teach us, and to fix us as we have need , all we have to do is let Him.

Since Novemebr 2008, our world has been turned upside down in ways I never imagined. We left everything familar by moving here to Wyoming, leaving all our comfort zones by coming to a ‘land we know not’… since arriving here in December of 2008, we have moved from Michigan to Arapahoe, from Arapahoe to Lander, and now it appears as though we will move once again with the hope that it will be our final move for quite a while. A piece of advice to all renters out there- do NOT rent a home that has the possiblility of being sold, unless you absolutely have to! LOL!

It has been interesting becoming acquainted with this unique town in the mountains… and thankfully we are probably only moving about 1/4 of a mile away into a bigger home more suited to our needs. God is GOOD, and has guided us through these past 8 1/2 months, He has shown unmistakenly that He is in control of all concerning His children as long as they allow Him. We are settling in nicely with our local church, I am thankful for the Body of Christ and the love they show continually. I am thankful for a pastor who seeks truth and the Holy Spirit… it seemed a rare thing to us at one time to experience a truly balanced Word and we are thankful that we have been brought to a place that we feel we can trust the teaching being brought forth.

Lander, Wy is so interesting! This little town is made up of the most eccentric and eclectic group of people I have ever seen. Among us are writers, artists, activists, scientists, engineers,musicians, photographers, nature lovers, farmers, etc… I am amazed at the concentration of diversity and yet the continuity of unity among fellow Landerites. People seem to flock here during the summer months from, literally, all over the world… NOLS students and alumni include some of the top minds in the world from engineers, to scientists, to NASA and so on. Those with a love of the outdoors find Lander to offer them everything they are looking for: beautiful rivers and streams, wildlife, mountain trails and a host of activities to accompany them. Not being a native Landerite, I feel like I have so much to learn about this place and its people. I look forward to observing  and participating in this quaint community. I especially look forward to discovering the Lord’s purpose in bringing us here.

Oh, and did I mention that right before we moved from Arapahoe to Lander, we found out that we were expecting our 5th. child? Yep. It HAS been an interesting year! For those of you who do not know, we have four beautiful boys, and an ultrasound recently confirmed -ANOTHER BOY! LOL, our little guy will arrive sometime in September and joyfully be added to the ‘Kilcoyne Clan’.

With all the changes that have been taking place, it has been hard to sit down and write much, in my last post I said that I would be posting more, but it has been a challenge for me to do so. So, I am NOT promising anything until I get a little more settled! LOL! There is much that the Lord has been ministering to me that I cannot wait to put in writing, and I hope to begin posting photos of all we have been up to.

Since we’ve been here, we have been blessed to be able to witness wild horses running on the plains in Arapahoe, we’ve gone on some hikes with views that make you want to stay all day, we’ve milked goats (how fun), we’ve seen bald eagles and many other forms of wildlife, met interesting people and and seen interesting things. Wyoming is beautiful in its ‘wild wild west’ way and we are grateful to the Lord for bringing us to such a beautiful place.

Over the next month or two we will be moving, setting up house, preparing to get back to school, bringing in and preserving the harvest from our garden and preparing for baby’s arrival. Certain ministry activities will be taking off as well, so life in the Kilcoyne household will be full!

If any of you find yourself in the middle of a whirlwind and life seems out of control like it has for us these past 8 1/2 months… fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith, the anchor for your soul. It truly is possible to experience His Peace in the midst of the storm, but you must fix your gaze on Him. I’ll leave you with lyrics from one of my favorite comforting songs:

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,

Look full in His wonderful Face;

And the things of earth,

will grow strangely dim,

in the light of His Glory and Grace.

Father, in the name of Jesus, I ask for Your Peace in the midst of our storms. May You Bless Your women today, give us courage and strength to face what may come and give us rest in You. Help us to fix our eyes on You alone and help us to trust that You mean what You say and that You will do what You promise, for Lord, You are truly worthy of our trust. In Jesus precious Name, amen.

Well, I spoke too soon about our plans to settle in here in Arapahoe, LOL! Apparently, the Lord has other plans for us.  The home we are renting sold much quicker than everyone thought and we have been given our 30 day notice. So, the plans for the garden and chickens are currently on hold, boy am I glad that we did not place our order for those chicks!

Before we left Michigan, I kept being drawn to the story of Abraham and Sarah again. I wonder what it was like for Sarah having to pick up and move so often through the land of Canaan. Most men have an innate sense of adventure and tend to handle transition pretty well, but women, we like to ‘nest’ and settle. When we got the news of having to move again, I immediately began to panic, thinking, “Lord! I just got everything the way I like it, my homeschool room is set up, my bedroom is just the way I like it, everything in the kitchen has it’s place!” How are we going to find a home as large as this one to accommodate our family and our needs? I wonder if Sarah felt like that? Did she get attached to a nearby stream that was a marvelous convenience for laundry day or a group of shade trees that offered shelter from the blazing sun? Not knowing what she was going to have to adjust to next, how far would she have to walk for water? Packing up and moving everything and everyone time after time as Abraham felt led or as God directed, she must of felt SOMETHING.

It’s hard to change in a moment! To shift gears and adopt a new focus. We like everything to go smoothly and neatly, and as women, we particularly like stability in our circumstances. Not knowing what God has in store demands a level of trust that our flesh is simply not comfortable with. As I struggled this week to accept circumstances that were not what I desired, a wonderful scripture came to mind:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

Isn’t that marvelous? God knew there would times in our life that could disrupt our peace and he made provision in His Word for us, a solution so that we could keep ourselves in peace. Life will always present us with new worries, but we don’t have to accept them! It is a beautiful thought that no matter what, we can always have peace. But first, we have to choose not to be anxious, we have to choose to be thankful, and we must choose to bring our requests to God. Now, the scripture doesn’t say how He will answer us, but it promises to give us peace, and when you think of it, there really is no better gift!

In this particular verse, according to my Strong’s Concordance (#1645), Peace means: harmony, tranquility, safety, welfare & health; often with an emphasis on lack of strife or reconciliation in a relation, as when one has ‘peace with God’.

That sounds pretty good to me, and I certainly do not want to refuse it at a time like this!

What about you? Do you need some harmony, tranquility, safety, welfare & health? Could you do without strife?

Then do what the scripture advises, refuse anxiousness, make your requests known to God and thank Him for all that He has done and all that He is going to do and if it doesn’t seem to work the first time, do it again and again! His Word will not fail, and His Peace will arrive on the scene!

Father I pray for all my sisters today, including myself, in the Name of Jesus, that whatever we are facing that could potentially  disrupt the Peace You have provided for us, I pray that You would help us to do Your Word as recorded in Philippians 4:6-7. Lord we make our requests known to You and we refuse to be anxious about anything, knowing that You do not want us to feel fretful and worried. You care just as much about the condition of our minds and hearts as You do about our souls and we thank You for the provision of peace in our circumstances, You are SO Good to us, and we receive Your Peace right now, In Jesus Name. Hallelujah!

Well, we’re here! Arapahoe, Wy is just 15 minutes from downtown Lander and we absolutely love it! The house is nice as well as the property, lots of room for the kiddos to run around and a whole new life for us to begin. We arrived here a couple days after Thanksgiving, and we have been going non-stop ever since! Living out in the country takes some getting used to, things and people go at a much slower pace out here. And goods are not available like they are in the city, so I am learning to make good use of the internet to acquire the things my family is used to on a regular basis.

Now that the holidays have past, it is time to get back to a schedule. We have a new home to upkeep, and schooling to be done. And I am working on several domestic projects around the home. We are also planning out a garden for this year, and believe it or not, we are planning on getting ourselves some chickens, lol. It feels like we are literally starting all over, and it can be overwhelming if I think about it too much. I just take one day at a time, do my best and leave the rest to the Lord. I hope to be setting time aside weekly to write now. The study on Diligence that I am working on should be posted soon… and a word from the Lord for those who will listen.

Once again, I want to say THANK YOU to everyone who has been there for my family in the last 3 months, it has been a FAST journey here to WY, and though we miss everyone terribly in Michigan, we are in awe of how God has brought us here to this beautiful place. Now we wait with anticipation for His Plan to unfold. If ever we need Him, which truly is always, it is now. How desperate I am to enter into new and deeper intimacy with Him, to learn to walk more in His ways, to reach knew heights of revelation, oh Lord may it be so.

Please continue to pray for our needs to be met, we still need furniture, still need to sell our mobile home back in Michigan. Our desire is to go completely debt-free and to purchase this home that we are now in and own it free and clear. All of this is impossible according to the world that we live in, but we know that all things are possible with God… we firmly believe that God does not want his people in-debted in any way, He wants His people free and we are now seeking Him for this freedom, not just financially, but in every area of our lives.  May all of His People see this truth!

Check back often for new postings, until next time, may the Lord’s hand be strong upon you!

Well, I have survived the first phase of our move… ha ha, I think it is more accurate to say that the Lord has sustained me through the first phase of our move! I am now at my in-laws home and pretty content to not have a lot to do right now!

I am a woman who deeply loves her husband, and I have realized how much it affects me to not have him with me on a daily basis. We have gone through quite a bit this past week, from trial to trial with the mobile home park management to the movers who were dishonest with us about our actual quote, I have never felt so attacked in all my life… I do not know what lies ahead for Daniel and I, but one thing is for sure, the enemy does not like it! Without Daniel being with me through this week, we have both felt the pain of our seperation on a much deeper level than before. I personally have realized just how vulnerable our family is with the absence of just one member. My heart aches to be with him again, and I imagine that is the way we should feel about our Lord Jesus. I imagine that if all of us would stop and think about that gnawing feeling in the pit of our stomach, or that ache in our soul, or the emptiness that nothing can fill, we would see that it is our spirits simply longing for the Lord and His return. Seeing my husband again will bring me such joy and comfort, imagine what it will be like when we see the King of Glory! The fulfillment, the rest, the  peace, the comfort, the JOY that we will each feel! And it will not be temporary, hallelujah!

Beyond the trials of the past week have also been deliverances, rescues and love. I am amazed what a powerful army the Body of Christ is when we unite or when we swoop in to rescue one of our own who is hurting. Oh how important it is to be in the Body of Christ! So many were praying for our family, and still are. So many were pitching in and helping in every way, I am again in awe of the ‘family’ I have been given!

Oh Lord, may we always be willing to demonstrate your love and power to those in Your Body and to the world!

Okay, we are getting closer to moving… and I have got to say, the excitement has officially worn off! LOL… this has been one of the hardest things I have EVER done in my life. I have a newfound respect for all those military wives out there who have to go through move after move without their husbands & kids in tow! We have been limited in what we are able to take on our move due to cost, and never having lived simply, I must admit that I am attached to my STUFF. I am amazed at how much we have accumulated through the years, and ashamed that we were holding on to so much that we didn’t really need. UGH! It has been traumatic to have to give away so much… especially things that I could have made $$ off of!

BUT- I have learned a lot in the past 3 weeks. I have learned that no item on this earth is worth what I have in family. My older boys, Jordan and Noah, have been pillars to me during this time. They have held me up through every obstacle and I stand in awe at their strength. My mother-in-law, Annette and father-in-law, Herman, have been the steady constant that I have needed to keep my composure. They have helped with the younger ones unselfishly and faithfully with no hesitation, how grateful I am for them. Vicki and Laura, my sisters, without whom I would have no one to listen as I vent, cry and problem-solve. I love them more than words can say. Claudia, a true prayer warrior, and my mother in all the ways that count… there are no earthly words to describe what she means to me. My pastors, Mike and Rhonda, through whom the Holy Spirit is given full reign… I could not do without the healing balm of their anointing… Chuck, our loyal friend, who has stepped up to be our handyman, and to take over household duties because my husband is not here to do it (I miss my Wyoming man!)…and countless others who have come to the aide of this woman in her time of need. But most of all, my Father… oh my Father! How faithful He has been! For every problem, He has been my problem solver…I am humbled at how mindful He is of His children, and I realize just how much I do not deserve Him!

The movers come tomorrow to take our stuff to move to WY, and I have been struggling with the fact that over the next month I will not be surrounded with the familiar. We will be staying at other peoples homes until Daniel comes back from WY to get us at Thanksgiving. It seems silly, but it feels as if every ‘comfort’ is being removed, and it does not feel good! What does that mean? Through all of this, even though I know God is working, He is also strangely silent. I know He is accomplishing something, but what?

I was researching WY this morning, looking up all kinds of things about the state from education to economic growth projections, and nothing is being revealed to me about what our real purpose will be out there. It is just a big ?.

I have often been taken to a portion of scripture throughout the years about Abraham and Sarah, where God tells Abraham to leave his father’s house, his land and go to a land that God will show him. I have always thought about what faith that must have to took. To just up and leave every comfort of home, and every support system you have to go to a place that God will show you. Can you imagine?! Well, lately, I’ve been re-identifying with that scripture in a big way! It is scary thinking about what it will be like without friends, family and the familiar. I used to daydream that God would call us on some big mission, that Daniel and I would ‘go out’ in faith-believing on simply a ‘word from the Lord’… I always looked at Abraham and Sarah admirably, and would think, “It would be SO great to be like them!” Now I am feeling like I was completely NUTS to think that! LOL, my zealous nature gets me into some very interesting situations and now, there is no turning back. The decision has been made, the confirmations have come, and this is it- we’re moving to a land we do not know, with people we do not know, NOTHING FAMILIAR! We do not even currently know where we live out there! Can anyone out there spell PANIC! I don’t know about you, but when I daydream, very rarely are any negative scenarios included, LOL. All these years of wanting to be like our father of faith and his wife, I never thought about how scary it might be, how lonely, or how there might be some parts of this process I just honestly do not like. (Like letting go of all my old stuff) Lord, help me to let go of the old and embrace the new!

No matter how frightening and lonely this process is, there is also a deep longing for something GREAT, there is an anticipation that only comes from the Lord, and a quiet excitement of things to come. Oh Lord, may we obey  You in every step and may we  please You in every way… Your Will be done, In Jesus Name.

Yes it is true… we’re heading out West! Lander, Wyoming to be exact and boy, what a gorgeous place! I’ve been looking at all the pictures online of the area and learning as much as possible about our new home as I can and every day, I gotta tell ya, I am falling more and more in love with the place! Set in a valley at the foot of Wind River Mountains with the Popo Aigie River flowing right through. A very popular vacation destination, this is our future home, I keep asking the Lord if we are really going to live there!

I have always lived in Michigan, and so has my husband, so this is a pretty big move for us. Daniel was offered a position in a field he has been dreaming about… and we both have felt an urging for a while that the Lord would send us out of state somewhere. We know that we are not just being sent out for the sole purpose of a new job for Daniel, but rather for a higher purpose. I do not know what He has in store for us but we look forward to it with anticipation!

Please pray for us as we embark on what truly feels like a new journey. For now, Daniel is in Wyoming setting things up for the family to join him there. I have much to do in the coming weeks to get prepared!